THE START NOW GUIDE

Here is a little homework to get you started on your path to a peaceful and clear connection with your hound...

This strategy will benefit you as a human guardian in however you choose to move forward with your dog, in any connection, discipline, game, in any home or for any companion dog in any setting. Read on and thrive...

First things first...witnessing

This is all about you. Focus off the dog and onto yourself. Because you are the point from which change can happen, not from your dogs side, from you! You have the power, its time to harness it. Most of the ways you respond to your dog will be reflexive, but crucial to witness, as a precursor to changing your response to align with how you would like things to be. For dogs are creatures of feeling that respond to your interactions thus. This witnessing is the first step to creating responses from you that form a solid offer of change for your best furry mate to accept. But the offer comes later. We are focusing on step one, the witnessing. Witnessing 'what is' is the first step to creating a new dynamic. Go ahead and witness. Start now. Just watch and take note first, without trying to change anything. You need a snapshot of how things are, before you can map a path to their true potential, which is absolutely awesome by the way. Your dog and you will be a miracle team. Be humble about it and be honest. If things with your dog could be better, some of what you witness will upset or surprise you, but be kind to yourself. It's about to change for the better, and there is no way you are the only one who has done those things or felt this way with your dog. You can bet on it. You are on the path to uncover the true gift of the dog/human bond.

The two things to witness..

There are 2 things and two of you, to put your attention on, when witnessing interaction with your dog. Watch for these things in the good times and when she's giving you the shits!

The first thing...

How do you feel? I mean, how do you really feel? Listening to your self talk or thoughts in that moment, registering your breathing (or lack of) and taking note of the level of tension or relaxation in your physical body. What emotions do you recognise? Are you present? Hows your heart?

The other first thing...

How is your dog feeling? Dogs are creatures of energy and of feeling, not of intellect. So focus on how your dog is feeling without translating that to what you think he is thinking! Do you actually know what he is feeling? Do you understand his communication style? Are you listening? This requires an understanding of dog body language as well as tuning into the energy of the moment, I highly recommend educating yourself on this matter to get a clearer picture of how your dog really feels about that hug or when you tell him to get out of the kitchen. Check out my recommended reading page and get stuck in.

The second thing...

How are you communicating? What words do you use for praise? For giving direction? How many words are there? Are they different every time? What body language do you employ to communicate? This one is usually not a considered action so may surprise you to recognise how powerful it is. Is your leash a communication line or a restraint device? Are you clear on what you actually want to communicate? Or do you just babble at him while you figure it out?

The other second thing...

What is your dog trying to communicate? Can you figure it out? Or not? How do you know that's right? Another place for some research (check out my recommended reading page again) for it's an area SO many people misinterpret. But opening with some receptivity on your side will go a long way toward finding the truth of the matter.

Once you have spent some time recognising and painting this picture of the way things are, you are ready to create the path to the way you want them to be, the way both of you would rather they be. Because if you are happier with the arrangement, guess who else will be vicariously overjoyed also? Yep. That's right. Aren't they the absolute best?!!

Relationships (with dogs or humans) are based on communication, so we need to build reliable communication lines before trying to communicate! And for most people that starts with slowing down and listening to themselves and the other party, just listening, witnessing.

When recognising 'what is', you may note that it most probably isn't what you want it to be. Try not to flood yourself with guilty feelings if indeed you find that you would like to be acting differently. Know that these feelings are required to prompt change, so they are helpful! If you begin witnessing and already can see changes you would like to make, go for it! If you feel the need for change but are not sure where to start; keep educating yourself, through selected professionals, literature, consults, group classes, Dog Chat Evenings or the Summit. There are so many avenues for information out there, utilise them, I shall do my best to help you!! Best of luck and I am glad you got to the bottom of this post in aid of improving the lives of you and your dog, off you go, go and witness to start a positive change for the better...

Goodbye for now, Amy